While cleaning out my email inbox of all the ‘IMPORTANT!!!!1 WE WANT TO SHIP YOU FREE STUFF’ and ‘SEXY SINGLES IN YOUR AREA!!!!!!!1’ messages, I came across a letter I’d written as a reminder to myself. Obviously it had done its job since I, um, forgot about it.
It must have gotten lost in all the exclamation marks.
But anyway, this letter didn’t have any content, as the message was in the subject.
And the subject: I PRAYED WE WOULDN’T TURN INTO ZOMBIES!!
Yes, yes it was.
I wrote it about a week ago because I thought it would make a good blog post. Or at least something people can use to make fun of me because my awkward coordination isn’t providing enough material at the moment.
(Nobody else emails themselves quirky thoughts because they may want to share them with the internet later? Hmm.)
You see, it was in the middle of the night after waking up one more time with Adele. I was upstairs rocking the baby, zoning in and out of consciousness, when this thought popped into my head. A thought that was completely rational at the time.
I prayed that my family wouldn’t turn into zombies.
As soon as I had the thought, which again, felt totally normal, my eyes burst open. And I smiled. And then I laughed outright at myself and thought ‘I’ve got to tell the internet about this!’
I think it stems from ‘The Walking Dead.’ That show stressed me out so bad. I lost sleep over it. And apparently I’m still having flashbacks that jump into my brain in the middle of the night.
I mean, imagine how awful that would be if the whole world was overrun with zombies? And what if I turned into one before my kids? They’d have to run away from me on account of the zombieness. Or what if something worse happened?
But what if the kids turned into zombies first? What would I do?
HOW DO YOU EVEN ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?