Monday, October 24, 2011

Random Monday: In which I discuss accidental self harm

1.      I accidentally just punched myself in the nose.  Hard.

2.      I mean really hard.  Hard enough to bring tears to my eyes and have me checking over and over again to see if it was bleeding.

3.      It wasn't.

4.      This, of course, was after I’d knocked my temple on the corner of one of our cabinets hard enough to make me see stars.  I have a long, thin knot on my head now.

5.      I always wondered what it would be like to see stars.  

6.      Now I know.  Kind of sucks.

7.      I think I have an inner ear problem that is upsetting my balance.  I also get dizzy whenever I put my head down.

8.      Maybe I should get that checked out.

9.      Usually everything happens in threes – Three deaths, three weird, unexplainable occurrences, three painful, idiotic, accidental self-injuries.

10.  I’ll probably lose a limb next.

11.  I love these random posts because I don’t have to be linear.

12.  Not that I necessarily am any other day, but at least on these days I don’t have to pretend.

13.  Like, I could start talking about cheese now if I wanted to.

14.  I don’t.

15.  I could also talk about that time I was 7 and broke my front tooth by running face first into a metal basketball pole.

16.  There was no blood then, either.

17.  I was playing tag and it was base.

18.  Obviously I’ve had this self-diagnosed inner ear problem for years now.

19.  So what’s your favorite cheese?

20.  I’m not sure I could narrow it down.  I’m a fan of most cheeses.

21.  Except Limburger.  

22.  I bought it one time because I’d never had it before.

23.  It made our whole refrigerator smell like ass.  

24.  Literally.

25.  Hey!  Look at my cute kids.


4 comments:

  1. thanks for the warning on the limbuger cheese. I would hate to have my fridge smell like ass. I'm a fan of blue cheese and feta. I love feta and humus on a wheat cracker.

    this post cracked me up

    ReplyDelete
  2. @JessicaJessica - that sounds awesome! I love feta! And hummus! And crackers, now that you mention it!

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting!