I’m really not against this toy. For reals.

For his birthday Sebastian got a Thomas the Tank Engine plastic train set, complete with a movable Thomas.  It’s really cool and has a bridge and shaky parts and such.  And it fits with the train set he was given last year for his birthday.  He’s in love with these toys and it’s been nonstop trains since he got the new one.  

But for some reason I can’t put the new one together without the directions.  I’ve tried.  I can’t make the pieces come together without step-by-step visual drawings.

I don’t know what that says about me.  But I’m gonna go ahead and blame the toy.

So I thought maybe if I started putting the old pieces with the new pieces I’d make it easier on myself since there would be more tracks, thus everything wouldn’t have be positioned a certain way in order to fit together.  Plus it meant MORE ROOM FOR THOMAS TO CHOO CHOO ALONG.  

Sebastian was understandably excited.

So this morning I fit it all together, only having to adjust the tracks a couple of times in order for it to work.

It sat in the living room floor all day just fine.  When Adele woke up from her nap and I brought her downstairs she was fussy, so I thought I could distract her from said fussiness by letting her tear up whatever was in her path.  Which was the train set.  

Now I only let her rip up a couple of pieces because I thought I could still see how to put it back together.  But when Sebastian woke up from his nap I guess he wasn’t too happy to see the tracks messed up.  Either that or, you know, he’s Captain Destructo.  Which is what I call him.  Because he destroys things randomly, completely, and diligently.  

Whatever it was, it meant that tracks were picked up and thrown across the room.  Or walked into another room and pitched in the air.  

There were tracks all over my house, is what I’m saying.

When I was fixing Adele her dinner I thought the train set would be a good distraction for him to play with while I cooked everyone else’s food.  So we gathered up the pieces and I started fitting them back together.

Let me just give you the highlights on how this played out, shall I?

Sebastian: Shaky Bridge!  Shaky Bridge!  Oh no!  The tracks aren’t finished!

Me: Let me just try this one.  Nope doesn’t work.

S: Shaky Bridge!!  Thomas makes good decisions!  We’re putting the train tracks together, right?

Me: Maybe this one?  No?  Really?

S: He’s in the tunnel!  Thomas is in the tunnel!  Shaky Bridge!

Adele: WaaaaHHHHH!!!!

Me: I’ll be right there!  Just let me finish this!  It can’t take too much longer.  Let me just try it this way.  There.  Oh crap the other end popped off! (in my head: sonofabitchsonofabitchsonofabitch you stupid tracks why won’t you fit together?)

S: We’re putting the train tracks together, right?

A: WAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!

Me: COME ON!!!

S: SHAKY BRIDGE!!!!

A: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!

S: SHAKY BRIDGE!!!!!!!!!!

Me: Almost got it! COME ON!  WHY WON’T YOU WORK!!!!

S: No, I don’t want the tracks put together. Don't put them together.

Me: FINE!  (In my head: Are you kidding me?  it would have been nice if you’d told me that TWENTY MINUTES AGO!  OH MY GAWD!)  (Also, I may have thrown down the tracks that I had in my hands and stomped off.)  (I am not proud of that.)

We had leftovers for dinner.

Shut it, Thomas.