Homemade Friday: Pinwheel Sweater

The pinwheel sweater is something I’ve had in mind to knit for years.  It just looks so sweet and simple, and it was. 

Please ignore the snotty nose.

I love all the colors that are shown in the pattern, but I’m attempting to use up as much yarn as I can before I buy more, and this black/brown wool was something I already had so that’s what the sweater became.  And actually, I’m happy with the way it is.  I know babies shouldn’t really be described as ‘sophisticated,’ and really, that’s not the right word I’m looking for.  Maybe put together?  

Anyway, it’s nice.  It’s something to keep her on the cold days to come, and the cold days like today that I was entirely unprepared for.  Though the kids are all still in their pajamas because I couldn’t sleep last night and so have zero energy to get them dressed, much less accessorize.

The pattern starts with just a few stitches and it increases every other round, then the sleeves stitches are put on holders and picked up to finish later.  I did have some trouble with the instructions when it came time to the sleeves because I am literal and need things explained in full detail, preferably with video of the different steps.  But that didn’t last too long.  And I didn’t do the fancy edging that the pattern called for, mostly because it looked too fussy and I didn’t want to mess with it.

There’s no button so I found an old black metal hair clip that I use to keep it closed.  Otherwise it just falls off her shoulders.

I think it’s sweet, and I’ll probably make another one as she grows older.  You know, until her mother knitting her sweaters becomes the most uncool thing ever.  Like in a year or two.

(Also – it would help if I wrote these out when I finish the sweaters, not a month later when I have to struggle to remember the details.)

Germans love boobies. It’s in their Constitution.

Chris’ mom buys lots of books for the kiddos, which I love.  And more importantly, they love them.  Both kids have a fascination with books.  And none are more entertaining than the large, board picture books that are full of everyday scenes these: 

 

And this:

But then you delve just a little deeper into the detail and you’ll see photos like this one:

And this one:

And this one of the creepy man in the kids’ sandbox at the pool:

And of course, there’s the woman who maybe has nursed a baby a little too much on one side, and not enough on the other:

And the obligatory old man in a speedo with a walking cane:

And this one only bothers me because there is a baby in a bassinet underneath a volleyball net 6 inches away from the pool.  Safety first, parents.

There’s the cat that will claw your eyes out if you come within a foot of his food:

 And yes, more boobies:

Of course none of this compares to the awkwardness that is reading ‘The Owl and the Pussycat’ to your child while simultaneously not laughing, even though it almost caused my head to pop off my neck and go rolling around the living room floor looking for a different children’s book that didn’t have inadvertent sexual innuendo.

But at least it didn’t have boobies.

Guess I should stop being bitter that my baby books were never filled out

I’m not sure but I think Adele has taken her first steps.

You see, I don’t know how to judge.  I’ve never been good at that sort of thing.  Like, what was (will be?) her first word?  She still doesn’t say ‘Mama’.  Sometimes she says ‘Dada,’ but I’m pretty sure that’s what she calls everything.  We’re working on ‘Uh-Oh’ when she falls but so far all she manages is ‘Uh!  Uh!’  So I don’t know if she’s had a true first word yet.  I believe in Sebastian’s baby book it says his first word was “Probably ‘bye-bye,’ I guess. Maybe.”  Because I am nothing if not observant. 

So Adele stands up and lunges down onto her hands quite a bit, and sometimes there is a step or two thrown in before she lands.  But she doesn’t have real balance.  Or she does have it but doesn’t want to trust that she has it.  So does that count?  Has she had her first steps?

I’m afraid she’s also fallen victim to the second child, I’m-too-busy-to-fully-monitor-every-milestone-that-passes syndrome.  And I feel bad about it.  I was a second child and always thought the fact that there weren’t as many pictures of me as a baby, or weren’t as many noted landmarks was my parents just not trying hard enough.  (Sorry, Mom.)

But, unfortunately, now I get it.  Any time I have a moment to myself where I’m not thinking about everything that needs to be done, I don’t feel like writing in a baby book.  I will, don’t worry Adele.  But I don’t necessary want to.

So Adele’s first steps.  Maybe she’s had them.  Maybe not.  She still won’t stand up very long, though she can.  And I’m almost positive she could walk if she just loosened up a bit and didn’t think about it. 

She’s at that age where being still is not an option, and just walking slowly is torture.  Even when I walk with her, holding her hands, she lets go so she can crawl because she’s a little speed demon – like a crab on crack and possible a gallon of espresso.  And dressing her and changing her diaper is akin to trying to put a Onesie on a rabid, wild monkey.  There’s lots of screaming and squirming and turning and arching of her back but also scratching and possibly biting and hair pulling. 

And Adele is very forceful and expressive with her own language.  She will tell you stories with hand gestures and emphatic emphasis.  (That’s totally a thing.  Look it up.)  She likes to attempt to put her shoes and socks on and she’s gained a certain recent attachment to burp cloths that she cuddles up with when she’s sleepy.  She climbs stairs like a pro and can entertain herself for at least an hour, unlike her older brother who needs me to constantly tell him HOW TO PLAY and if I’m not paying enough attention he tries to spit on me.  Because he is a boy and also a little needy.

So maybe Adele has and maybe she hasn’t taken her first steps or spoken her first word.  And maybe she’ll spend decades bothered by the fact that the record of her early years isn’t quite as detailed as her brother’s, though really neither are what they should be.  But with any luck one day she’ll have her own children who will resent her and then she will understand.

Right?

It’s almost embarrassing how popular I am

Well, as you know I am one of the most well-known and lovable bloggers around.*  And as such, I have a fan base that likes to send me presents.  Because I’m awesome.

(Or maybe it’s because my dad’s cousin saw something and thought my kids would enjoy it.  Either way.)

I did not realize how blurry this photo was until I saw it
on my computer screen.

I’m not exactly sure how ‘cousin-ish’ we are, because even though I’ve been told exactly how we’re related, I have a hard time remembering things of that nature and also I am a horrible person.  So she’s Glenda, my cousin, probably removed once or twice.

She reads my blog and is always nice about telling me she enjoys it.  And really, it takes a tolerant person to not only read my complaining and nonsense and also tell me that they like to read it.  But I’m totally fine with people lying to me to make me feel better about myself.

So Glenda the Good Witch (I’m positive she’s never heard that one, right?) mailed me, or rather my children, these little singing stuffed animals in the hopes that they would magically cast a spell (or ‘spell you’ as Sebastian says) and make them into ‘Happy Nappers.’ 

You’ll understand when you watch this video.  But don’t watch if you don’t want this song to remain on repeat in your brain for your entire life and probably half of the afterlife, too.  Or if you have no soul, cause dancing babies makes even cuddly baby hedgehogs look like Satan.

Ironically these came in the mail after Sebastian had taken his first nap in at least a month, probably longer.  I will say that Adele takes a nap every day and has grown into a really good sleeper.  She even sleeps through the night.  (KNOCKING ON WOOD SO HARD MY KNUCKLES ARE BLEEDING!)  But it’s probably because the kids already knew these were coming and have been acting accordingly.

So thank you Glenda.  Very, very much appreciated!

(It really made my day.)

*Lies